WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:02.363 --> 00:00:04.363 [uplifting piano music with strings] 00:00:11.880 --> 00:00:14.664 I'm Angela Nsimbi, a mother. 00:00:15.725 --> 00:00:17.160 I'm a mentor. 00:00:18.422 --> 00:00:19.593 I'm an author. 00:00:20.152 --> 00:00:21.753 I'm a mental health activist. 00:00:22.560 --> 00:00:24.723 I'm a woman who is passionate about life, 00:00:26.515 --> 00:00:29.935 I'm a wife to one. [laughs] I always say that. 00:00:30.791 --> 00:00:34.352 Yes, and, um, I love to impact 00:00:35.438 --> 00:00:37.438 in order to transform lives. 00:00:38.257 --> 00:00:40.421 How did I know that I have a crisis? 00:00:40.421 --> 00:00:46.107 I remember one particular time. I was standing at the sink, doing the dishes. 00:00:48.785 --> 00:00:52.197 I just felt like a force come upon me,  00:00:53.200 --> 00:00:55.200 and I, like, found myself 00:00:56.147 --> 00:00:58.220 trying to get to my bedroom 00:00:58.375 --> 00:01:01.716 so that I don't get embarrassed  before the children. 00:01:01.794 --> 00:01:03.435 It was making me lose control. 00:01:04.138 --> 00:01:07.310 Of course, at the time, I'll not lie  that I knew what it was. 00:01:07.310 --> 00:01:08.565 I didn't know, 00:01:08.737 --> 00:01:11.336 but as I was trying to make my way to the bedroom 00:01:11.336 --> 00:01:14.039 I remember at the time, falling in that corridor 00:01:14.720 --> 00:01:16.520 and then I saw all my children. 00:01:16.520 --> 00:01:20.083 Of course, when crisis, because I screamed and then they came. 00:01:20.756 --> 00:01:22.360 They were all looking at me 00:01:24.210 --> 00:01:27.263 and I remember the  the best I could do at that time. 00:01:27.343 --> 00:01:31.255 I just told my big girl, who was really young. She was nine at the time. 00:01:31.485 --> 00:01:33.621 I told her, "Call your dad." 00:01:36.799 --> 00:01:41.658 There was another incident when I also  carried the baby at the time. 00:01:42.303 --> 00:01:45.192 It was only 9 months. She was only 9 months. 00:01:46.153 --> 00:01:47.217 On my back. 00:01:47.819 --> 00:01:52.099 I was feeling afraid. I was feeling insecure. 00:01:53.160 --> 00:01:55.361 And I was talking all the while. 00:01:56.135 --> 00:01:59.065 They had to force me to be sedated, 00:01:59.839 --> 00:02:01.839 to take the child off my back. 00:02:02.606 --> 00:02:05.514 And, ah, so at that point going forward 00:02:05.514 --> 00:02:09.651 I saw the reaction around with my family members because 00:02:10.204 --> 00:02:13.791 people are not comfortable when it's something to do with your mental health. 00:02:14.164 --> 00:02:17.784 For me, it took a period of two years before the doctor told me, personally, 00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.471 what he was treating, it is bipolar affective disorder. 00:02:22.082 --> 00:02:25.692 And I remember him telling me, "This is  something you'll live with for the rest of your life." 00:02:28.073 --> 00:02:32.934 But of course when you go back deeper, all  these things are rooted in trauma. 00:02:34.340 --> 00:02:35.355 You grow up. 00:02:36.602 --> 00:02:39.289 When you're also in a dysfunctional family    00:02:39.863 --> 00:02:42.351 you grow up when you're not equipped to handle conflict, 00:02:43.635 --> 00:02:46.797 and so one thing builds up, you know? 00:02:46.797 --> 00:02:49.704 One thing leads to another, and eventually, you can't take it anymore. 00:02:51.664 --> 00:02:53.040 At first, I used to take three types.   00:02:54.460 --> 00:02:57.900 Eventually as I...because I kept going in for my reviews 00:02:58.016 --> 00:03:02.521 they removed me from two kinds  of meds, so I remained on the mood stabilizer, 00:03:03.926 --> 00:03:08.860 and, uh, eventually she started to reduce the dosage. It  was making me uncomfortable. 00:03:09.377 --> 00:03:11.120 And I remember telling that to the doctor. 00:03:11.607 --> 00:03:16.852 So I eventually realized but can't I manage my mental health outside medication? 00:03:19.352 --> 00:03:22.926 In terms of how am I helping other people. 00:03:23.790 --> 00:03:26.751 My first book is this, Breaking Free, 00:03:27.452 --> 00:03:33.820 and the subtitle is, "I'm not bipolar: a journey  of hope, healing, and restoration." 00:03:34.641 --> 00:03:39.944 So in this book I simply talk about my life 00:03:41.824 --> 00:03:42.811 from childhood 00:03:44.190 --> 00:03:47.019 until that point when I had the breakdown. 00:03:49.429 --> 00:03:52.001 I actually explain to people 00:03:53.129 --> 00:03:57.120 um, the need for us to have strong families. 00:03:57.569 --> 00:04:01.740 And, um, the time I had the crisis, I didn't know where do you start. 00:04:01.991 --> 00:04:04.880 In this book, I also write about 00:04:05.581 --> 00:04:07.251 how I have supported other people. 00:04:07.683 --> 00:04:11.585 Because first by writing the book  that already it's like a real manual 00:04:12.440 --> 00:04:13.945 you give the world 00:04:15.185 --> 00:04:20.823 to read practically what has worked  because what I write here is tried and tested.  00:04:20.823 --> 00:04:21.323 It's my life. 00:04:23.009 --> 00:04:24.900 The Mental Health Guide 00:04:26.107 --> 00:04:27.996 is something we do every year, 00:04:29.494 --> 00:04:30.992 and the birth of this 00:04:31.485 --> 00:04:36.885 because thought, Where can people with psychosocial  disabilities speak and be heard? 00:04:38.203 --> 00:04:43.440 Where can they speak and not be invisible and, you know, someone pushing you down? 00:04:43.440 --> 00:04:46.462 That even here, you can't talk. How are you to talk? 00:04:47.005 --> 00:04:53.271 Because I realize I appreciate  disability inclusion. However, I have noticed that   00:04:53.271 --> 00:04:58.609 whenever people with psychosocial disabilities,  when we enter certain spaces, 00:04:59.082 --> 00:05:06.734 even where it's disability, especially because, I mean,  "Where is... you're not using a crutch." 00:05:07.548 --> 00:05:09.385 "But I see you have all your legs." 00:05:09.664 --> 00:05:11.628 You know, it's not seen. 00:05:12.686 --> 00:05:14.645 So because it's not seen 00:05:15.640 --> 00:05:17.125 the discrimination is deep. 00:05:20.331 --> 00:05:21.991 So I said this is the solution 00:05:22.701 --> 00:05:26.590 to make sure the voice of people with psychosocial disabilities is heard. 00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:31.960 Our strength has also been  in support groups. As we do those support groups   00:05:31.960 --> 00:05:39.057 families need to be educated to know how do  I support this loved one, and I keep using   00:05:39.057 --> 00:05:44.280 my story as the testament of what can be done  when family stands 00:05:45.168 --> 00:05:49.320 because when you stand with that person, you don't know. Yes in that time crisis, they look like 00:05:50.206 --> 00:05:51.884 probably the most useless person,   00:05:53.166 --> 00:05:57.562 but you'd be amazed at what support does 00:05:58.091 --> 00:06:00.531 when you come together and hold that person's hand. 00:06:01.205 --> 00:06:03.126 They could be the next solution 00:06:03.990 --> 00:06:06.199 to a generation that is crying for help. 00:06:12.110 --> 00:06:13.830 [mechanical whir of a camera]